I wish moving my office chair didn’t sound like trying to strangle a pterodactyl.
My alarm didn’t go off. Woke up 7 minutes later than I was supposed to. Mike: “You should invest in a real alarm clock.” He’s right. Walked to work. Day unexpectedly gray and misty. A whorl of pigeons sprung up out of nowhere, scattering in every direction. Looked up and closer, saw a hawk. Watched a man in a suit close his cell phone, pocket it, and then toss his...
I must admit, before meeting Tom, I had heard so many rumors and so much gossip that I was afraid. Frankly, his gambling debts, his animal magnetism, coupled with his disregard for the feelings of others… His elaborate gun collection, his mad shopping sprees, the face lifts, the ski trips, the drug busts and the hundreds of rooms in his home. The tax shelters, the public urination…I was nervous...
The Roman Alphabet, by Andriy Bondar I’ve long had the urge to write at least one poem using the roman alphabet one of my friends thinks that if we switch to the roman alphabet our people will steal less and immediately our messy byzantinisms our obnoxious sovietisms our endless ugro-finnisms (sorry ugrics, sorry finns) will disappear and something will snap in our heads ...
Bob Dylan vs. A.J. Weberman (circa 1971) →
She needs a good clean… but she’s pretty cute. Little Dragon, “Ritual Union”
“If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need.” —Cicero
In which our political reporter Phil Rucker finds...
Phil: So what is Rick Santorum doing to prepare for the debate?
Rick: Candidly? Nothing.
Phil: Mock rehearsal?
Rick: I've never done one in my entire political career.
Phil: Dreaming up new zingers?
Rick: I try not to script at all.
Phil: Huddling with consultants and aides?
Rick: I don’t have consultants. ... I travel by myself. I like it that way. I’m not afraid of reporters. I should be, but I’m not.
“Determine never to be idle. No person will have occasion to complain of the want of time who never loses any. It is wonderful how much may be done if we are always doing.” —Thomas Jefferson